hiatus on hiatus

im supposedly on a blogging hiatus, but i am putting the hiatus on a hiatus for this. ah i am in emotional turmoil and i have to lash out.

i really dont know what to do now. like sherry, i have 0 motivation too. right now i dont care. i can fail all my subjects and i dont care. ehh. but consequences will ensure i do well right? wrong. you know what? last week i just felt like taking all my money and leaving. click, just like that. i dont know. i just want to get away from all this. all these assumptions. all these expectations. aiyoh. i just need to stick to myself and be extra selfish and moan to myself and have immense self-pity. but i shouldnt and i cant. i just hope when i reach my limit i dont do something stupid.

and the feeling was .. i dont know. indescribable. you confuse me, you know that?